It’s a wrap.

I have just finished another book. Phew. Sigh of relief.

I wish I felt that rush of pride that so many others talk about- a bird finding its wings and flying out into the world- or some such poetic description.

Nope, mostly its relief.

Thank goodness I managed to finish it. My ADHD brain always encourages me to give up half way through. My self doubt and imposter syndrome sparks up and leads me to question why I wrote it in the first place.

It will probably be rubbish -by the end of the process I have lost all ability to judge!

No -one will buy it, especially if i don’t promote it properly (I probabaly won’t) .

I do not really even want to look at it, as I will want to change it. (too late)

It was intended to be helpful (how will i know if it really is?)

Have I done justice to the subject, my dogs’ voices, the young people and their families I intended it for?

It makes no difference if I am being published ( disagreements with editor (who knows best) about titles and cover images (that I do not like) ) or if I self publish- making a decision, sticking to it.

The really, really sad and unfathomable thing is I am already half way through writing the next one, in my head.

Must be some kind of sickness.